Nine Signs Your Smart Phone Is Actually a Ring of Power
Face it, you know what you should give up for Lent.
It lets you disappear for a little while.
It has become precious to you.
You grow frantic if you think you have misplaced it.
4. You find yourself lying alone, stroking its faintly luminous surface.
5. You struggle to hand it over to someone else, even for a moment.
6. You bemoan its evils for society in general but believe you can resist its influence and use its power for good.
7. You cannot imagine intentionally destroying it.
8. Some sage person you admire has refused to take a smart phone.
9. It seems to be listening...watching...bending your will to its purposes...
...and One Sign That It's Not:
It is far from indestructible.
Take note that Denethor was doomscrolling through his Palantir every evening.
LOL (correct as always)